Protein? It’s a big NO, NO!
If protein were a real person, it would have conquered the internet today! Why, you ask? Mainly ‘cause there are so many articles, researchers and nutritionists talking about it constantly. To be honest, Indians are already pretty cheesed off with the thought of consuming protein.
So we went ahead and tried to understand the psyche of all the Indians who have banned this super dominant macronutrient from their diet. Here are the 10 best reasons why you shouldn’t consume enough protein!
- Getting long, lustrous hair is just another headache
Great hair is just a cosmetic thing. We don’t need that. Be it thin, dry hair or early balding, we gotta flaunt our flaws.
- Muscle is overrated, pot belly is just so cuddly
Ever seen Winnie the Pooh or Santa? These adorable characters are ‘chubby’ around their tummy. So what, if ripped muscular men look good!
- Who needs strength? We don’t work in the fields
We have long severed our ties with agriculture and heavy work. So why chase the strength that protein gives? Utterly unnecessary.
- Late night snacking is so much fun!
“Protein can kill appetite”, say researchers all the time. Well, they clearly don’t know the fun of eating cakes and biscuits late at night. It might make you gain weight, but that’s alright too!
- Why burn fat when you can store more?
Fat is our energy storage tissue. Proteins are their enemy, replacing them with active muscle. So much work! Instead, let’s store fat and be ready for the apocalypse that was supposed to strike in the year 2012!
- Looking different every month due to weight gain is so exciting
Imagine never ageing and maintaining a steady weight year after year! While protein might help you with weight loss and management, that’s just plain boring. Instead, let’s look different every month with a little weight gain and stump everyone around.
- Chipped nails is soon to be a fashion trend
Smooth nails with protein intake? No way! We believe chipped nails is soon to be a trend. So if you want to stay in the game and be trendy, watch out and stop eating protein today.
- Smooth skin is a myth! It should be tough and wrinkly
So what if our skin is mostly protein and fat? Photoshop and not consuming protein will help you in maintaining a smooth skin. Let’s be real and embrace patchy, wrinkly skin!
- So what if protein lowers blood pressure?
Protein helps lower both systolic and diastolic blood pressure. In addition, protein can lower bad LDL cholesterol too. Can you believe this new research? Well, it could be true but what’s the proof?
- Protein is just propaganda
So what if we need a gram of protein per kilogram of body weight? It’s just in the mind. Everything about protein is just propaganda!
There is tons and tons of research and information on protein on the internet. Don’t believe it all! Let’s continue to look our worst and skip eating enough proteins altogether.
Cheers to a protein-free life or maybe not. The choice is yours.